Shannon Beador is taking a bold step towards accountability, sharing a haunting selfie from her lowest point with her Real Housewives of Orange County costars.

In an interview, Beador revealed she was “stunned” to see the photo and described the experience as “utterly distressing” for her. “I didn’t want to acknowledge myself in that state, and I didn’t want anyone else to see me that way either,” she added. “I genuinely thought I’d never share it with anyone.”

Beador, 60, shared the photo with fellow Housewife Heather Dubrow in a moment captured for the Bravo show’s 18th season. By doing so, she wants her costars and viewers to understand the moment that changed her life.

“When someone searches for my name, that’s what they’ll see: my face, covered in blood, from the night that easily marked the darkest point of my entire life,” she explained. “But I wanted to be able to open up about everything that happened.”

Beador was arrested in September in Newport Beach, California after striking a residence with her car and leaving the vehicle. She was charged with misdemeanor hit-and-run and DUI and sentenced to three years probation. In an exclusive interview, she said the arrest “forced [her] to re-examine [her] life” and “make amends.”

“I have a lot of work to do. It’s probably lifelong, but I feel good about myself,” she related. “I want to have a healthy relationship with myself.”

At the same time, Beador refrains from viewing her crash as fate, telling that she was incredibly fortunate that no one was hurt but herself.

“I don’t want to downplay what happened to me and say like, ‘Well, it was meant to be,’” she shared. “Because I could have hurt someone.”

In her interview, Beador said she “deserved to get hurt” in her crash.

“I made a very reckless choice,” she said. “I could have killed someone.”

The Real Housewives of Orange County airs on Bravo Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET. New episodes stream the next day on Peacock.